I was going to write about my last dating venture, but this came out instead. I'll write about "The Bad Boy" later.
Letter to my future boyfriend:
After 3 or 4 months, we always have to have the "conversation" and I always state the obvious: "I'm not ready for a boyfriend, I don't think I am ready to make any sort of commitment right now. But you can trust me, there is no one else and I love what we have and would like to keep doing what we're doing".
All this is true, but what guys do not understand is that most of the time when I say that, it is not because I don't want a boyfriend. Yes, I might have a teeny, small issue when it comes to commitment (some might even call me a commitment phobe) but that's besides the point. The point is that you haven't showed me why you would be worth me getting past my phobia and making a commitment with you. Maybe you don't call enough, or I feel like you haven't made enough effort to get to know me. The real "me", not the amazingly, great, fun and fabulous me that you know and love. I mean, the one that has a temper that will blow you away from time to time. Or the me that gets anxiety at the thought of bowling. (I know what you're thinking, it's just I hate doing things that I'm not good at and I have a sneaky feeling I'm not good at bowling. I'm not sure though, I haven't played since I was 12...) That sort of thing. Do you know my favorite flowers? Or what my mom's name is? What I really do for a living? Where my fear of commitment stems from? If you answer no to 2 out of these 4 questions, I'm sorry you have no business trying to be my boyfriend.
Some girls just want "a" boyfriend, that has never been me. I think out of the hundreds of guys I've dated, I've only had 4 boyfriends two in high school and two in college. I know what it takes to be in a relationship and I honestly prefer not to put in the work unless I know that not only is it worth it, but it's possibly going to last. And come to think of it, 3 out of those 4 boyfriends tricked me into the relationships by giving me ultimatums. Slap a title on it or we're done. No bueno.
So we can come to the conclusion, that maybe I am not scared of being your "girlfriend", there is a chance that I'm not holding out for something better, and ok maybe we will NEVER make it FB official but maybe I do want to be with someone. So this is me, defending my thoughts on commitment and my fear of relationships. With some effort I think my fears will subside, but for the time being you have to earn that right, earn that trust, earn the title and earn my time. Do the work and actually prove me wrong, show me you're not just another frog faking prince. That like any good business investment, I can expect to see a return. I think you get my point.
Letter to my future boyfriend:
After 3 or 4 months, we always have to have the "conversation" and I always state the obvious: "I'm not ready for a boyfriend, I don't think I am ready to make any sort of commitment right now. But you can trust me, there is no one else and I love what we have and would like to keep doing what we're doing".
All this is true, but what guys do not understand is that most of the time when I say that, it is not because I don't want a boyfriend. Yes, I might have a teeny, small issue when it comes to commitment (some might even call me a commitment phobe) but that's besides the point. The point is that you haven't showed me why you would be worth me getting past my phobia and making a commitment with you. Maybe you don't call enough, or I feel like you haven't made enough effort to get to know me. The real "me", not the amazingly, great, fun and fabulous me that you know and love. I mean, the one that has a temper that will blow you away from time to time. Or the me that gets anxiety at the thought of bowling. (I know what you're thinking, it's just I hate doing things that I'm not good at and I have a sneaky feeling I'm not good at bowling. I'm not sure though, I haven't played since I was 12...) That sort of thing. Do you know my favorite flowers? Or what my mom's name is? What I really do for a living? Where my fear of commitment stems from? If you answer no to 2 out of these 4 questions, I'm sorry you have no business trying to be my boyfriend.
Some girls just want "a" boyfriend, that has never been me. I think out of the hundreds of guys I've dated, I've only had 4 boyfriends two in high school and two in college. I know what it takes to be in a relationship and I honestly prefer not to put in the work unless I know that not only is it worth it, but it's possibly going to last. And come to think of it, 3 out of those 4 boyfriends tricked me into the relationships by giving me ultimatums. Slap a title on it or we're done. No bueno.
So we can come to the conclusion, that maybe I am not scared of being your "girlfriend", there is a chance that I'm not holding out for something better, and ok maybe we will NEVER make it FB official but maybe I do want to be with someone. So this is me, defending my thoughts on commitment and my fear of relationships. With some effort I think my fears will subside, but for the time being you have to earn that right, earn that trust, earn the title and earn my time. Do the work and actually prove me wrong, show me you're not just another frog faking prince. That like any good business investment, I can expect to see a return. I think you get my point.
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